- If you want to know your future, don't consult a palm reader, fortune
teller, Miss Cleo, or tarot cards. Go straight to blind soothsayer Ulf
Buck, 39, who claims to predict a person's future by reading the lines
on their buttocks. According to Buck, the lines on one's backside are
much more reliable than a palm. He explained, "The bottom is much
more intense - it has a much stronger sense of expression than the hand
in my experience." By rubbing his fingers along a number of lines
on a client's butt, Buck is able to predict their future monetary success,
family life, health, happiness and more. He is quick to dismiss any claims
that the butt-touching is for any personal gain. "I do not need to
feel bottoms for my own pleasure. My wife is quite beautiful enough for
student in Montana bicycled his way over seven states and 32 days to arrive
home, 2,473 miles later, at his parents' home in Huntsville, Alabama.
23-year-old Aaron Sosebee endured vicious winds on the plains of Kansas,
a cattle drive in Montana and wildfires in Colorado. He cooked rice on
his tiny camp stove every night and bathed in rivers when he had the chance.
By the time he arrived home he had lost 20 pounds. His motivation? He
hates to fly.
Georgia - All around the country this summer, state and local fairs will
provide entertainment for thousands. But not just any gathering sponsors
a watermelon-seed spitting contest, hubcap hurling, pigs'-feet bobbing,
and the ever popular mudpit belly flop. For those events and more, you
would have to travel to Georgia for the 7th Annual Redneck Games. The
Redneck Games attract more and more people every year, and last year over
12,000 attended the festivities. International film crews have even captured
the redneck spirit for the news. In addition to the mud pits, excruciatingly
hot weather, and juicy watermelon, another bonus is the loose dress policy:
at the Redneck Games, shirt and shoes AREN'T required.
- A porn actress by the name of "Nicky" is four months pregnant
and wants to give birth on film. The production has been tentatively titled
"Ripe" and will follow the entire process...with plenty of scenes
on how she got that way. To date three scenes have been shot since the
woman, a former stripper, auditioned a month ago. One scene remains to
be shot before she gives birth. The Department of Child, Youth and Family
Services wants to separate the mother and child if the film is completed,
but the laws are not clear on whether this is child abuse.
The Condomi condom company has officially declared its XXL condom a flop
in Britain. They claim sales are low because British men are too shy to
purchase the larger-sized condoms. Apparently, though, men in Germany,
France and Italy aren't that bashful because the XXLs sell well in those
countries. Researchers believe British men are just modest: "Research
shows that most men rate their penis as smaller than average, which of
course is not true," Dr. Glenn Wilson said. Oddly enough, it's only
the British men that have this ailment. Victoria Wells, a Condomi rep,
said, "Unfortunately, UK retailers aren't as convinced as we are
that British men are well-endowed, but we hope that our research, coupled
with Dr. Wilson's research, will help convince them to now start selling
the XXL product."
Malaysia - Malaysia has some of the strictest anti-drug laws; thus, some
addicts are sinking to new lows to get high. Gone were the days of glue
sniffing, gasoline smells and the like, now it's time for sniffing fresh
cow dung. An official explained the addiction, "The cow dung emits
gases like sulfur, and addicts sniff on these gases to get high."
Despite hanging laws for drug traffickers, "new" highs have
yet to be addressed. A National Narcotics Agency official said, "The
problem is not very serious yet, but we are worried as this method means
addicts can get high for free."
- Raymond Turmel believes it's his constitutional right to grow and traffic
marijuana for medicinal purposes, but the government didn't exactly agree.
The 49-year-old was sentenced to 18 months for growing and possessing
cannabis for the purpose of trafficking, but was released from jail until
his appeal is heard. In the meantime, Turmel is already beginning his
next entrepreneurial effort - selling "get-out-of-jail" kits
online, on his Medpot website. The kit comes complete with appeal forms
that are partly filled in for people to print off. Hopefully this will
help others experiencing the same injustice as Turmel.
"The Boot Lady." Drivers unfortunate enough to park in Cat Crosby's
assigned parking spaces in Alexandria, Va., likely will meet her because
she watches for violations from her monitor camera in her office and when
she spies one, she attaches one of those parking boots on the car -- so
it cannot be moved. The Washington Post reports several times a week there
is a confrontation -- drivers who don't believe a private citizen can
boot a vehicle and Crosby, who won't remove the boot until the offender
pays her a $25 fine. Police are called, the paper says, to smooth things
over and to tell angry drivers it actually is legal for Crosby to boot
their vehicle. Crosby, who runs Kiniko Industrial Corp., works at an office
complex where parking is scarce. Businesses are assigned a specific number
of spaces. Police say her efforts are turning into a regular pain.
- Australian farmers have found the ultimate guard animal - the alpaca,
a miniature camel from the high Andes. Alpacas are known for being extremely
protective and like a good guard animal, they often sacrifice themselves
to save their charges. When they see an enemy approach, for instance a
fox, they emit an ear-piercing shriek that alerts the sheep and farmer.
Generally the fox become intimidated by the noise and simply leave. But
alpaca breeder Geoff Fysh said, "Usually a fox is too quick and will
get over a fence... but there are a handful of anecdotes of alpacas actually
catching up with a fox and they will kill them if they get a chance. That's
usually by trampling on them with their front feet which would be a pretty
slow death...they don't have a hoof or anything."
Dog's Cigarette Habit Too Much
England - Yvonne Stubbs has decided to give up smoking not for health
reasons, but to help cure her pet dog's 20-a-day addiction to cigarettes.
Her dog Patch, a Jack Russell, immediately attacks the ash tray when she
puts out a cigarette. He is addicted to chewing the tobacco and likes
to spit out the filters. If Patch goes for too long without a cigarette,
he whines and makes begging noises until he gets what he wants. His owner
has even considered getting him a nicotine patch. "I don't begrudge
anybody a fag, but this is ridiculous. He doesn't like whole cigarettes,
just the ends. I would try nicotine patches on him, but I don't know where
I'd put them and he'd just scratch them off," said Stuffs. In the
meantime, she and her daughter are trying to stop smoking to encourage
Patch to give up the habit as well.
California - Little three-year-old Lupita woke up in the middle of the
night to a dark, quiet house. Instead of panicking when she couldn't locate
her parents, she put on her backpack, and wearing only pajamas, hit the
road in search of her loved ones. Tow-truck driver Ken Pinkham was returning
home at 4:00 am when he saw the toddler walking on the side of the road
all by herself. As he passed her, Pinkham says Lupita shot him dirty looks.
Trying not to frighten her, he quietly went back to his truck and called
the police, keeping an eye on her all the while. When officers arrived
at the scene, Lupita kicked one of them in the genitals, yelling in Spanish.
They found her address in the girl's backpack and took her home. That's
when the real story unfolded - Lupita's mother was pregnant, and her parents
had to suddenly leave for the hospital. But they didn't leave the girl
unsupervised. They told a roommate that they were leaving, but the roommate
promptly went back to bed.
Disney World Cancels 'Hawk Feedings'
World has stopped releasing flights of pigeons at shows because local
hawks have been feasting on them. The pigeon releases began 30 years ago
and have been a regular part of Cinderella's Surprise Wedding Show which
occurs every day. But the regularity became the problem and the hawks
living in the area figured out when it was mealtime. "When you release
a group of birds like that, it's an invitation to a meal," said Geri
Hylander of the Audubon Center for Birds of Prey in nearby Maitland, Fla.
Hylander said the hawks, a protected species with more than a 4-foot wing
span, thrive in an unspoiled wilderness area around the park. She said
they are not particularly aggressive, but "they're opportunistic."
Pennsylvania - Patricia Lee Santi, a kennel operator, has worked hard
to build a reputation for breeding championship dogs. So when she recently
had a falling out with her semen storage company, Clone Inc., she filed
a property dispute over the frozen assets. For over 15 years,Santi had
a positive relationship with Clone Inc. While Clone insists the breeder
owes them money, Santi argued that they had an agreement whereby if she
brought them clients, they allowed her to store dog semen there. Santi
has bred at least 300 championship dogs and says her semen storage is
critical to a top dog's legacy, but Clone refused to release her property.
Tempers flared over talk of embryos, ovulation tests, and canine progesterone,
until the judge helped them reach a settlement. Santi gets her specimens
back and will pay Clone $2,800 for transferring the goods to another facility.
Minnesota Man Shooting at Cars
- Gregory Peter Carr was annoyed by speeding vehicles and heavy traffic
in front of his home, by County Roads 29 and 164 in Minnesota. So he took
matters into his own hands. Armed with a 12-gauge shotgun and approximately
14 rounds of ammunition, Carr aimed at vehicles passing in front of his
house and several were hit by his six shotgun blasts. There were no injuries,
but the road rager immediately went into hiding. Police found Carr in
a nearby soybean field and he remains in jail until his first court appearance.
He told authorities that all he wanted was the drivers to simply slow
down and take alternate routes.
Michigan - A television station in Detroit, Michigan, reported that a
29-year-old man is in trouble for a fight Saturday night. The bickering
quickly escalated to an all-out fight, and the unidentified man used his
prosthetic arm to hit the 40-year-old victim, Richard Brooks. He swung
the arm at Brooks's face and left a deep cut. Brooks has been treated
at the hospital and is reportedly doing fine.In the meantime, the perpetrator
is expected to be arraigned on charges of assault with intent to do great
- When David Anderson's (known as "Crazy Dave"), snake bit him
twice, he went to the local bar because he didn't have a phone at home.
He chugged a beer before even telling anyone what happened to him. He
was rushed to the hospital, and the Milwaukee County Zoo had to send over
antivenin, to which Dave turned out to be allergic. He was reported in
fair condition two days later. Anderson apparently got off lucky because
cobra bites often cause loss of muscle control and the ability to breathe.
Neighbors knew he kept a snake, but they had no idea it was venomous.
It's illegal to possess a venomous snake in Minnesota.
Man is Shot While Surprising Relative
New Mexico - The Garcia family encountered a freak shooting accident on
their annual fishing trip. Late one night, the family was walking along
a trail when some of them decided it would be funny to sneak ahead, hide
behind some bushes, and scare the others. Oh, they scared them all right.
In fact, one relative was so frightened that he shot and wounded Felix
Garcia, 36, three times before realizing who the culprit was. Felix was
wounded in the stomach, hip, and thigh, but it wasn't life-threatening.
Lt. Britt Snyder of the Sheriff's Department said, "The investigation
is still ongoing to determine whether any charges will be filled. There
doesn't appear to be any intent."
- Police in Pennsylvania report that a father of two boys, ages 4 and
6, took them with on a friendly excursion to their neighbor's house. To
rob them. The homeowner's returned in the middle of the burglary, and
they found the two boys waiting for their dad. The infamous parent, Shawn
Popish, has been charged with burglary, criminal trespass and corruption
of minors. In his defense, Popish claims he was trying to STOP a burglary
in process, but police aren't buying the story and say it's "very
unlikely". In the meantime, the children were given to their mother.
Mediocre Advice Offered for 25 Cents
In addition to enduring a painful breakup, Canadian teenager Trevor Dame
couldn't find a summer job and needed to more resourceful to earn money.
For 25 cents, he dispenses "mediocre" advice to passersby. The
teenager feared customers would want a refund if he advertised "good"
advice, but he felt he could handle giving "mediocre" advice.
Thus, he scaled back his operation and wore a sign that said "Mediocre
advice - 25 cents" to attract customers. Dame explained his motivation,
"I just went through a breakup, I can't find a summer job, and I
was feeling lonely and bored. I thought I'd do this and make some money
and hopefully make people smile."
This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for two days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any.
True story... we had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?"
did he have to leave the set, but half the crew did too--they were laughing
To hear a
group of South Korean scientists talk, they have developed the break-through
invention of the age...a cloning machine. The Discovery cable channel
reports a group called the Clonaid Society says it is able to clone humans
using its new RMX2010 machine. Not only does the group says the machine
works, it's making it available on the Internet for $9,000. The Clonaid
Society is an offshoot of a cult called the Raelian sect. Leaders say
they are thrilled the United States does not yet have laws against human
cloning and feel this country will be a great market for the invention.
By the way, the Raelian sect was founded in the early '70s by a former
Canadian journalist, Claude Vorihon. He considers himself a prophet and
claims to have about 55,000 followers.
- Zero-tolerance policies are constantly in the news, as Tasmania recently
discovered. Six racehorses have been disqualified in the past year after
traces of opium were found in their system. Even though their trainers
suspect poppies have been blown or deposited into the horses' feed, the
zero-tolerance policy of Racing calls for immediate disqualification.
A horse trainers' rep, Chris Crook, said the opium deposits are so rampant
that "it's a problem and no Tasmanian feed supplier can guarantee
their feed is clean." Additionally, he claims the amounts of opium
in the horses' systems are so minute, that it couldn't possibly affect
their performance. In the meantime, the suspected doping horses have to
sit out of the races.
Instant Cow Dung on the Market
INDIA - Hindus
purify places of worship by sprinkling them with cow dung and water. What
if you live in an urban area and cows are scare? How is one to sanctify
an area then? Enter an Indian dairy firm. An Indian company recently created
the product "instant cow dung" to help these very people. The
new instant product requires the dung to be mixed with camphor, turmeric,
and sandalwood paste. Thrilled with the improved smell, one housewife
said, "I used to avoid cow dung because of its bad odor. But this
Holy Cow Dung does not smell that bad, and I am going to apply it at home."
Many urban spiritualists claimed their holy rituals were incomplete without
cow dung, so the Agri Gold Company quickly marketed the mixed version.
Shanghai Bears Prefer Coke
China - Despite rising temperatures, thirsty bears at the Shanghai Wildlife
Park are refusing water. Their drink of choice? Coca Cola. Keepers at
the zoo make sure to feed the bears chilled watermelon and apples, but
with temperatures practically unbearable, the animals have resorted to
begging for drinks. They stand on their hind legs and fold their arms
to beg tourists. The onlookers have been giving them bottles of water
and Coke, but the bears want nothing to do with the water. A news agency
said, "The bears drink up every drop of Coca Cola they get, but kick
away a bottle of tasteless mineral water after a few mouthfuls."
British Columbia - A Canadian man who had an affair with a juror during
his murder trial was sentenced to nearly six years in prison for obstruction
of justice in what a judge termed "almost unimaginable." The
British Columbia Supreme Court imposed a harsher sentence on Peter Gill
than it did on the juror, Gillian Guess, who was convicted of the same
charge. The court called Gill's actions during the murder trial an attempt
to "subvert justice." Gill, 37, was convicted of having an affair
with Guess in 1995 while she was serving on the panel that eventually
acquitted him and four other defendants of
in the neighborhood of Joseph A. Foran High School in Milford Connecticut
awoke to a curious sight on the hillside located behind the school last
June. Weed killer was used in an apparent act of vandalism by unknown
persons to burn an outline of a 25-foot phallic symbol in to the grassy
hillside. For over a month the graffiti has remained after numerous attempts
to erase the image. Workers will have to uproot the grass and reseed the
hill in order to clear the image before the start of school later this
month. No complaint was ever filed with the police and it has not yet
CHILE - A
circus troupe from Circus in Concepcion, in Chile, while performing at
traffic lights used their skills to make a little extra cash performing
for pedestrians and motorists. As a women rolled her car window down to
toss them change, a juggler tossed a spear puncturing her tire. An acrobat
somersaulted over the hood and snatched the woman's gold necklace. Another
smashed her passenger window and snatched her bag while a fire-eater threatened
to blow flames in her face. Police captured one of the acrobats but the
stolen property was not recovered.
- Customs officials at King Khaled International Airport in Riyadh encountered
a slight problem while doing a routine search last week. About 300 live
poisonous cobras escaped and wandered the airport after a man received
a request from officials to display the contents of his bag. The reason
why the man who had just disembarked a flight from Cairo was carrying
the serpents is unknown.
Austrian police following up on reports of a corpse floating in Lake Constance
found only an abandoned inflatable sex doll, police said Monday. Police
rushed to the lake bordering Switzerland and Germany after a boatsman
called to say he had spotted a body. A 20-minute search turned up the
female sex dummy, they said.
It was in
1989 that a shabbily dressed man went up to a teller at the U.S. Bank
of Washington in Spokane, and asked her to validate his 60 cent parking
ticket. She refused. The man asked to talk to a bank manager about the
matter. The manager also refused. So 59-year-old John Barrier withdrew
all the money he had on deposit -- $1 million -- and took it down the
street to the Seafirst Bank. "If you have $1 in a bank or $1 million,
I think they owe you the courtesy of stamping your parking ticket,"
stepped off the plane, 19-year-old Emma Nunn from Great Britain thought
to herself, 'oh my gosh, we're in Canada!' Her surprise is understandable
since she and her boyfriend thought they were going to Sydney, Australia,
not Sydney, Nova Scotia. They chalk it up to a mistake while ordering
their tickets online, and thought nothing of it when they started the
first leg on their journey "down under" aboard an Air Canada
flight in London. But they began to get suspicious when the jet touched
down in Halifax, Nova Scotia. When they finally realized that was as far
as they were going they made the best of their stay soaking up the culture
of the small industrial town on the coast of Cape Breton Island.
In the Dorset
hillside of southern England there is a fertility symbol standing 197
feet tall that is most famously known for its erect phallus. This symbol
proved to be fertile ground for a publicity stunt pulled by the British
Family Planning Association. They draped a 21-foot-long condom over the
statue's penis in an effort to raise sexual health awareness. The statue
is carved into the chalk rock of the hillside and has been around since
the second millennium BC. At least one couple has claimed that after spending
a romantic evening in the one-foot trenches of the chalk-man, their fertility
problem was resolved.
CALIFORNIA - At least 1,128 mothers with suckling babies flocked to the
Berkeley Community Theater to set an unofficial world record for simultaneous
breast feeding. The babies fell silent and began to feast fiendishly as
the participants set out to beat the record of 767, which was set by mothers
in South Australia. Organizers promised the mothers as they left that
next year they'd do it again in the much bigger Oakland Coliseum. Numbers
will be submitted to Guinness World Records.
MA - David
Arndt, an orthopedic surgeon, left his patient with an open incision in
his back. It seems the doctor had some overdue bills and needed to rush
his paycheck to the bank. After his 35-minute trip to the bank, Arndt
returned to the operating room and finished the surgery within a few hours.
The patient did not suffer any harm from Arndt's absence and was able
to recover in the intensive care unit. Arndt's license has been suspended.
- A nursing mother boarding an airplane with her infant daughter at Kennedy
Airport was forced to drink her own breast milk from three bottles she
was bringing on board with her. Security wanted to make sure the milk
did not pose any threat to other passengers. This procedure was within
federal guidelines at the time. The policy has since been changed.
TX - A woman was jailed after punching out her husband. The woman who
was arrested for punching and scratching her husband was about to be released
after her husband posted her bail, but she couldn't wait to get out of
the courthouse before taking another swing at him. Which promptly landed
her in jail again.
- The pride of the Aquarium of the Americas in New Orleans is their shark
tank. 400,000 gallons of water teaming with tooth-infested, flesh-eating
death attracts hundreds of thousands of visitors every year. Earlier this
week a party of people was standing on a cat-walk used by keepers to feed
the sharks when the platform gave way, precipitating ten people into the
water. It took nearly 15 minutes for workers to rescue the unwilling bathers
while the sharks swam around their frantically kicking feet. "I was
just praying none of the sharks got agitated from all of the splashing."
said one man, "I mean, they got sharks in there bigger than me!"
No one was seriously injured.
Thailand's Population Development Association chief Mechai Viravaidya's
methods of contraception are being questioned. Viravaidya had recenlty
made a statement urging rural residents of the country to start placing
lemon slices or cotton soaked with lemon juice into the vagina to prevent
pregnancy. Some studies have shown that the high level of citric acid
can kill sperm. Thai Health Minister Sudarat Keyuraphan claims the studies
of this method are incomplete and recommends using a condom.
living in that one story trailer home? Turn your double-wide into a double-Tall
as well! Manufactured Housing firm Fleetwood homes has developed a manufactured
home that comes with a second story. Assembled much like a one-story,
the second-story is lifted on top by a crane and runs approximately $45
per square foot Currently the two-story houses can be found in California
and Texas and have now made their way to Mississippi where 15.2% of residents
live in manufactured homes.
- A local bank decided to fix its ATM machine to spit out extra cash on
occasion in efforts to better the moods of its customers. Apparently the
road construction was so bad that the people of the community were complaining
constantly. The bank is calling it a "road warrior" promotion.
No date has
Amateur Brain Surgeon Busted
CAIRO - Egyptian
police have arrested a man who performed brain surgery on a number of
people even though he had only a primary school education, court sources
said Wednesday. The 40-year-old saw around 200 patients a week in the
town of Fayoum near Cairo. You'd think his pricing would've scared patients
away... his charge a mere 22 Egyptian pounds ($4.74) per patient. The
fate of his victims was not immediately known.
Steven Craig Seach, 32, faces fraud charges after claiming to be a paraplegic
who was robbed and left hanging upside down from a fence post. He made
his claim at a news conference packed with police and media people. Due
to his claims, Seach received an abundant amount of donations from across
the city. After being caught, he apologized and asked the public to leave
him alone, he's had a hard life. His mother assured the public she would
be keeping him on a dog chain from now on.
people too. At least, that's the thinking of cat-food maker Meow Mix Co.,
which this fall launches Meow TV, a half-hour cable show aimed at giving
America's 85 million felines a break from the endless humdrum of The West
Wing, Touched by an Angel and Dog Eat Dog. CEO Richard Thompson foresees
"a Discovery Channel for cats," though the firm will produce
only a few episodes at first. "There will be squirrels, bouncing
balls, little fish swimming by, and all the things that cats love to watch,"
beware... Ed "Cookie" Jarvis, 36, says his competition preparation
is very time-consuming. He rides 29 miles on an exercise bike and walks
a mile on an indoor track daily. You'd think good old Ed would be thin,
but alas the 420-pound Jarvis' competition doesn't allow for this. He
is the world's pizza, ice cream and french-fry eating champ. His records
include consuming a 17-inch pizza in three minutes and devouring six pounds,
14 ounces of ice cream in 12 minutes.
Officers Busted in Credit Card Scam
TOKYO - A
13-year-old boy told his father someone broke into his home and started
a fire in the living room. The father reported the crime to police. After
police investigated and found no evidence of a burglary, the boy admitted
to making up the story to cover up the fact he didn't do his homework.
He even put fire to a stack of newspapers and a computer.
Students Buried Alive for Thanksgiving
- Residents of a southern Indian village allowed their children to by
buried alive as part of a ritual "thanksgiving" service to two
Hindu goddesses. In preparation for the ritual the children endured intensive
prayer sessions and a 30-day fast. Before being buried the children were
rendered unconscious from the preparations. A good thing, too! If the
children were not unconscious by the time they were to be buried, the
families would be charged a 35 dollar blasphemy fee each. They were only
underground for a brief time and suffered no ill-effects.
HANOI - A
gourmet chef in Vietnam died after being bitten by a venomous sea snake
that he was trying to cook as the nightly special. Le Hung Cuong, 22,
picked up the half-metre sea snake from the glass aquarium it was kept
in to prepare the restaurant's specialty, porridge with snake's blood.
The snake lashed around and bit his left hand. He died en route to the
hospital. "It was bad luck for him and for us," the restaurant
owner said. Fortunately, the snake was retrieved by another chef within
a few minutes and served to the waiting customer.
Baby Born in Chicago Starbucks
An expectant mom gave birth in a restroom at a suburban Chicago Starbucks.
Mother and 7-pound-10-ounce son are reported recuperating at Evanston
Hospital. Starbucks workers called paramedics, who arrived four minutes
later to find the big event already had taken place. The woman, identified
as Lisabeth Rohlck of Chicago, waved to a crowd of cheering customers
as she was wheeled to the ambulance while she talked on her cell phone
to her doctor. She had been on her way to pick up her 2-year-old son when
she went into labor and pulled into the Edens Plaza parking lot.
Australian national politician, Barry Haase, has been purchased by a madam
and will spend a day cleaning her brothel. Madam Mary-Anne Kenworthy outbid
all other participants in a Rotary Club raffle, in which the prize was
a day of work from Liberal Party member of Parliament, Haase. The final
bid was $540. Haase has said its for charity and he's big enough to play
this game. Kenworthy has said she looks forward to seeing him decked out
in a frilly apron.
Saskatchewan - Potentially violent inmates at a Saskatoon psychiatric
facility were busted having a little too much fun at a barbeque held in
the unit. Apparently seven inmates were photographed grilling filet mignon
and climbing trees, while one inmate was caught about to go skinny-dipping.
Inmates in this unit have a history of violence, and many were transferred
there from Canada's regular prisons. Officials at the center agree the
inmates should have been better supervised.
- Father Enrique Abad of Santa Rosa parish asked the mother of a 3-year-old
girl he was baptizing to quiet her down. The child did not stop crying.
Abad then took it upon himself to slap the child in the face as he anointed
its' forehead with oil. No comment was made on the priest's behalf.
An inmate who was convicted of strangling his wife was denied his request
for the state to pay for a sex change operation and hormone therapy that
would make him a woman. The judge did, however, order a medical evaluation
and appropriate treatment for Michelle Kosilek, who legally changed his
name from Robert. Koselik brought his case against the Department of Correction
saying they were in violation of the eighth amendment, which prohibits
cruel and unusual punishment. The Department of Correction was not charged
on this account. After determining Kosilek does in fact suffer from gender
identity disorder, the judge ordered he recieve at a minimum psychotherapy--and
maybe some hormone treatments.
Oklahoma State University scientist Hermann Burchard told New Scientist
magazine to forget about using nuclear warheads to save the world from
disaster -- just use a giant airbag. Burchard believes giant airbags could
one day save the world from being struck by a comet the size of that which
sent the dinosaurs into extinction. He believes the idea is, "safe,
simple and realistic." He does admit there are still a few details
to iron out though.
- A woman and her two children were carjacked in their driveway by three
men who took the woman's keys, and then forced her into the back of her
white Volvo. The men drove them to a township where they spoke with another
man, presumably their client. The man did not seem happy with the color
of the car, so after stealing the woman's cellphone and jewelry, the men
politely let her out of the back of her car and gave her exact directions
the phrase "little black book" has been used to describe lists
of women and their phone numbers kept by swinging bachelors. But in the
case of Riley Toney Jr., his little black book was actually three books.
And the contents weren't full of possible hot dates, they were packed
with dates of another kind ... information on birthdays, anniversaries
and other facts relating to Toney's family -- all 307 of them. It seems
that when the 94-year-old World War Two veteran died in Huntsville, Ala.,
this week, the Huntsville Times discovered that Toney had, over the years,
carefully chronicled the amazing growth of his family tree in the three
volumes. Statistics include nine living children, 47 grandchildren, 110
great-grandchildren, 106 great-great-grandchildren and some 35 great-great-great-grandchildren.
His wife of 75 years survives and will likely have the kind of amazing
familial support in her grief that many others don't have.
- A Turkish woman has been ordered to remove the cows she was storing
in an apartment building in the city of Trabzon. She has begun to sell
the "large number" of cows reported being stored there. Neighbors
are relieved the cows are moving out. Apparently, as a local alderman
reported, "Noise, smell and manure everywhere make a very ugly scene."
applied for a credit card and was denied on account that she is dead.
That is, according to the Social Security Administration. Turcotte has
been perceived dead since 1986 in which time she has gotten married, filed
tax returns and paid off her student loans. So why hasn't the IRA inquired
about why a dead person was listed on an annual joint tax return? Who
knows. But local Social Security officials did promise Turcotte they would
fix the mistake.
Florida - Carlos Suarez and Yesenia Reyers were having dinner when a bulldozer
came roaring through the back of their house. Part of their roof was torn
down. The bulldozer hit a second time before screaming neighbors and the
couple got the driver to stop. Apparently homes in a nearby neighborhood
were scheduled to be torn down, but this was not one of them. Police spokesman
Tony Rhodes said, "What can you say? They screwed up. They hit the
wrong house." The contractor did promise to repair the roof immediately
- Debbie Turner thought what she was seeing was either a midget or a little
boy. The latter turned out to be the case. Apparently an 8-year-old foster
child stole a pickup truck from a lot at the Chrysler Corp. plant and
drove over 20 miles to see his family before being stopped. Turner said
she saw the truck and could not see the boy over the dashboard. The keys
were in the truck when the child found it.
a Christian Democrat running for a seat in Sweden's Parliament, is calling
for porn to be broadcast on television all day every Saturday in Sweden
to help boost the population and the economy. Kirpikli believes the best
way for couples to have more sex and procreate is to watch pornography.
"I want erotica and porn on television every Saturday, all day. Then
people would feel like having more sex. I think most people like porn,
even though they don't want to admit it," the Mercury News reported
she said in a statement. "There is nothing wrong with a man and his
wife or partner watching porn together." Kirpikli's proposal did
not have the full backing of her party.
Going to Great Lengths for a Job
18, has never wanted to do anything but be a flight attendant. So when
she found out she did not meet the height requirement of 5ft 2in, being
that she was only 4ft 9in, she took matters into her own hands. Richards
had her legs lengthened, which involved having both femurs broken in two
places and screwing six five-inch pins to each bone which was attached
to a fixator (a metal frame). Four times a day Richards had to turn a
screw on the fixator to lengthen her legs. Talk about dedication. Despite
her efforts, Richards still misses the height requirement by one inch.
Oooooh, so close!
Man is Repeatedly Scared to Death
has died--again and again, and again. The cause of death? Alarm clocks,
doorbells, delivery vans and the window cleaner. Apparently 63-year-old
Todd has suffered heart stoppages and temporary brain death for the past
38 years every time one of these devices startle him. He would go into
a dead faint for more than half-a-minute and then would be unable to move
or speak for up to four hours following. His disease remained a mystery
until recently. Currently Todd has an emergency pacemaker which won't
allow his heart to stop for longer than one-and-a-half seconds. Todd says,
"We've even got an alarm clock - one with a buzzer and a bell."
- Twenty-one people were killed by a wave of molasses after a tank filled
with the melted sugar ruptured in the harbor. Over two million gallons
of molasses, weighing 13,500 tons filled the tank. The 15 foot wave of
molasses swallowed eight buildings. A reason for the rupture was never
home from the bars late at night and suddenly you HAVE to go. Is it a
dangerous alley or an unfortunate bush? How about a private toilet that
springs right out of the ground at your feet? For guys in Great Britain,
this soon could be a reality. It's the UriLift -- an innocent looking
manhole by day -- a pop-up potty at night. The Dutch stainless steel invention
is installed 4 feet under a city street but it rises from the ground in
2 minutes and returns just as quickly. It is to be under British streets
within the month. Three men can use the UriLift at once, it is lighted,
has automatic flushing and is connected to the sewer system.
- What may seem to most to be a challenge on Fear Factor is a delicacy
among the people of Skuon. People here support themselves and their families
by selling fried, palm-sized tarantulas in what is otherwise an impoverished
farmland community. Described as crispy on the outside and gooey on the
inside, these spiders are black, hairy with venomous fangs before they
are fried. One local said, "They taste a bit like crickets, only
much better." I think I'll take his word on it.
Road workers in south-western England infuriated local officials after
they painted a white line on the side of a local highway right over some
road kill. A passerby took a photo of the furry creature, which is noticeably
a badger, and sent it into a local paper who printed it. A government
spokesman said the instance was completely un-acceptable and they will
be in search of an explanation.
A restaurant in Berlin makes you eat in the dark and hired blind waiters
to guide you around. It is called "Unsicht-Bar," which means
invisible in German. Of the 30 employees 22 are blind. The whole restaurant
is pitch black and customers have to be guided to their tables and to
the restroom. While you can choose whether you would like a fish, meat
or vegetarian dish, you won't be told what it is. The point? "To
have an extraordinary experience of tasting, feeling and smelling,"
said the owner. The average meal lasts three hours, and at the end they
will tell you what you were eating.
Ever Seen Ball Lightning?
Mike Lyons tells WPBFChannel.com in West Palm Beach a man has reported
seeing what only about 1 percent of the population will ever see -- the
rarest form of lightning called ball lightning. "It was a bright,
glowing orange ball about the size of a basketball," the man said
in the report. "It entered my house through the glass in the front
door. It went right past me or possibly even through me into the living
room. Then, it left the house through a large window where it hit a tree
in the backyard." Lyons says ball lightning has "scared the
pants off folks" as the bright spheres seem to appear out of nowhere.
They've been seen in buildings, coming through solid walls and in airplanes.
Lyons says science may never be able to explain ball lightning -- all
researchers know is that it's real.
at Harvard Medical School have succeeded in growing major parts of penises
in their laboratory. Currently they have only been able to produce erectile
tissue of rabbit penises. After having their new parts implanted, the
rabbits started to do what rabbits do best. They were able to copulate,
penetrate and produce sperm. The researchers are now trying to grow entire
penises in the test tube and eventually want to use human tissue.
received 687 phone calls in three days at his law firm from an anonymous
debt collector. They would scream obscenities, play porn tapes or just
stay silently on the line. Ho wasn't even the correct target. Apparently
debt collectors in Hong Kong are known for their criminal-like way of
collecting money owed to them. They often will throw snakes or a swarm
of grasshoppers into an apartment inhabited by a person who owes them
money. They have also been known to hang dead dogs and cats on doorways.
report that it was just a coincidence when the winning New York lottery
numbers turned out to be 9-1-1 on the anniversary of the 9/11 tragedy.
5,631 people selected the number and each of them won $500. "The
numbers were picked in the standard random fashion using all the same
protocols," said lottery spokeswoman Carolyn Hapeman. "It's
just the way the numbers came up." There is a 1-in-1,000 chance of
the numbers 9-1-1 coming up in the lottery.
A US psychoanalyst
plans to create a dating service in which people are matched by their
therapists. Clients of TheraDate will be assessed on factors such as obsessiveness,
defense mechanisms and nervous tics. TheraDate's creator, Frederick Levenson,
is convinced such data, obtained from confidential questionnaires completed
by a client's therapist, can lead to happy relationships. He also believes
that people in therapy are attracted to others with similar experiences.
"The smartest people are the ones in therapy," he said. "They're
wonderful people, very bright, very funny."
Ind. - A high school freshman football player could not find a helmet
to fit the 66-centimeter circumference of his head. Tyler Money was sidelined
for a month because his head was too big to fit even the largest helmet
made for an NFL player. His search came to end when a sporting good distributor
in Virginia provided a $146 helmet big enough to fit him. Helmets can
be used safely for up to six years. The six-foot-one, 285-pound Money
should be able to use the helmet the rest of his high school career --
providing his head doesn't grow.
N.Y. - A religious ritual ended up costly for a New York church and painfully
for one loyal worshipper. After the evil spirits were cast out of Sophia
Reitan by the Pentecostal Upper Room Tabernacle minister as he pushed
her backwards into salvation, an absent-minded church assistant forgot
to catch her. Reitan ended up with a broken arm, $80,000 of the church's
money in restitution and a clean soul.
In attempts to drive young ruffians out of a Boston subway station, the
Massachusetts Bay Transportation Authority Police has come up with a brand
new idea. The cheerful show tunes and marches of the late American composers
George Gershwin and John Philip Sousa are being played over the brand
new speakers installed at the station. Police claim that, in this case,
brass and strings are a positive alternative to handcuffs and pepper spray.
- Popular clothing outfitter Levi Strauss & Co. is denying rumors
that its new "anti-radiation" trousers are designed to scare
consumers into buying them. The Icon S-fit pants are fitted with lining
shields in the pockets to protect consumers from the electromagnetic radiation
caused by mobile phones. Although Levi's denies implying that mobile phones
are dangerous, they feel there is no reason to be cavalier about it.
of people in Thailand are flocking to the top of the Had Sai waterfall
in the Pungna province to view a puddle which they say is in the shape
of Buddha's footprint. They believe the water in the puddle will relieve
pain and bring good fortune. They also believe the buddle is being guarded
by a frog. While the national parks commission does not want the area
to be damaged by the thousands of visitors, they believe the situation
is now out of there hands seeing that the people think it is a holy place
and will not stop coming.
in crucifixes, execution-style hoods and body-covering bandages paraded
down the runway of a fashion show in Madrid, Spain to the sounds of a
man's voice praying the "Our Father" and a woman panting erotically
while iron bars screeched open and closed. The scene caused those attending
the show to walk out in protest. Designer David Delfin said he did not
mean to make a mockery of what is typically Madrid's most prestigious
fashion show. He insists he in no way meant to trivialize repression against
women and defends his collection saying it is the most feminine one he
- Several cases have been reported in southern Florida of unusual sturgeon
behavior. According to local fishermen, these large river-dwellers, reaching
up to five feet in length, are leaping out of the water and landing on
unsuspecting fishermen. Injuries sustained from these flukes range from
minor lacerations and busted teeth to broken sternums and collapsed lungs.
It is not clearly understood why the sturgeon leap out of the water so
dramatically. Most experts simply conclude that they do it, "because
In the latest
ad campaign from Roman funeral home and coffin maker CISA, women in skimpy
costumes are used to sell death-related products. The ad campaign also
includes a sexy calendar featuring an assortment of handmade wooden caskets
along with scantily dressed women and it is causing a stir among women's
groups and an unexpected wave of attention for the small company. "We
just wanted to make people laugh a little during what is a stressful situation,"
Giuseppe Tenara, one of CISA's owners, told United Press International.
"We never expected so much attention." In one ad a platinum
blond model leans over the "Imperial" casket to reveal her black
G-string. Another features a model in a see-through outfit leaning on
the coffin with a glass of red wine.
Vice Principal Bites Off Eyebrow
A Nigerian school vice-principal was charged with grievous bodily harm
after her attack on a local journalist at a police station. Claiming her
act was in "self-defense," Rose Eze stands accused of biting
off the eyebrow of the victim. The presiding Magistrate described the
act as "barbaric" asking: "Why should a woman bite off
the flesh of a fellow human being? Is she an animal?" Fortunately,
there were several witnesses to the event because Eze swallowed the evidence.
The bizarre attack certainly raised an eyebrow among law enforcement officials.
- An audience of more than 2,500 gathered in Finland to witness the sixth
annual air guitar world champ-ionship in the summer of 2002. Twelve finalists
from eight different countries swallowed their pride and wailed away on
invisible six-strings, hoping to win the title and the grand prize of
a real guitar. While the act may seem shameful, jury head Juha Torvinen
claims, "One should not be ashamed of playing air guitar. It's like
masturbation. Everyone did it at some point." Although the competitors'
props may have been invisible, their talent shone as bright as a rock
Dogs Spray-Painted in Russian Ad Campaign
- As competition between rival stores in Penza escalates, Russian shop
owners have found a new way to advertise. With the use of sausages and
cutlets, workers are luring stray dogs into their shops and spray-painting
them with their store's logo. In order to turn a profit, homeless canines
are being turned into walking billboards promoting store icons and the
items they sell. The marketing battle has become so intense that layers
of paint are accumulating on dogs as shop owners paint over other logos
and replace them with theirs.
Have Your Funeral on the Internet
in Perth are offering to "web-cast" funeral services for family
and friends who can't make it to the real thing. Relatives ordering the
web-casts are given a password to access live footage of the funeral.
A simple web-cast costs $110, another $110 buys either a delayed broadcast
of the service, held on the Internet for 30 days, or a DVD or video recording
of the service. Customers who want all three options pay $275. Michael
Duff of the Metropolitan Cemeteries Board said the MCB is making no profit
from the service.
Snow White and the Seven Shao Lin
- It's about time somebody updated the classic Snow White and the Seven
Dwarfs with a little high-powered martial arts action. Disney is negotiating
with the Chinese choreographer of ground-breaking action films "The
Matrix" and "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon," to direct
a live-action take on the popular fairy tale. The "Snow" update
is set in the 1890s and follows a woman who returns home to Hong Kong
to attend her father's funeral after 20 years abroad. She discovers that
her stepmother is plotting against her and escapes to mainland China,
where she seeks solace with seven Shao Lin monks who protect her.
A Czech prisoner
could end up serving a longer sentence after guards heard voices coming
from his backside. Prison wardens in Brno say they discovered the 48-year-old
had hidden a tiny walky-talky up his butt. He was allegedly using it to
communicate with his wife to arrange bribes for investigators and lawyers
involved in the case against him. She would park her car a few hundred
meters from the prison, every day. "I have worked here since 1996
but I can't recollect ever finding anything stuck in such parts,"
said Sona Haluzova, spokeswoman for the Brno prison.
- Children five and older are putting down their sweet and innocent Barbie
dolls and picking up the terrifying and disturbing Stretch Screamers.
The new toys are designed to let out screams of pain when pulled by the
arms and legs. Not only can they be tortured by tugging at the limbs,
strangulation causes their brains and eyes to pop out of their heads.
Children's desensitization to violence is a cause for concern among parents
and officials promoting child safety. The current predicament has heightened
parental awareness for future toy purchases that may have the potential
to psychologically damage their children.
California - Four filmmakers from San Diego face jail time after their
involvement in a conspiracy to solicit an assault with deadly force. The
men were charged with paying homeless men in food, shelter, alcohol and
money to inflict pain on each other for the project entitled "Bumfights:
A Cause For Concern." Some disturbing images displayed in the film
include one homeless man ripping out his front tooth with pliers and others
running head-first into steel doors or beating each other bloody. This
kind of thing has the potential to breed even worse projects.
A miniature Frenchman lost his battle in court with U.N. officials, keeping
him from practicing his preferred occupation. Manuel Wackenheim argued
the 1995 ban enforced by the highest administrative court in France that
abolished "dwarf throwing" and kept him out of a job. The ruling
of the court has deprived Wackenheim of "being hurled around discotheques
by burly men." The U.N. Human Rights Committee claimed that the ban
was necessary to protect public order.
Oregon - Portland Brewing Co. has created a new brew called "Governator"
beer that CEO Jerome Chicvara is surprised California brewers didn't think
of first. The brewers designed 3,200 cases bearing the Pumping Iron label
that are meant to be an amusing tribute to the governor of California.
Chicvara thought of the idea while joking around with his kids and their
friends, who had combined the words "governor" and "terminator"
into "governator." "And I thought that's good, that could
be a beer," Chicvara said. "Sometimes we get carried away, but
we did this for fun." The bitter ale is only being sold in California
and comes in a 22-ounce bottle with a label featuring a muscular figure
posing like a body builder.
6-Year-Old Shoots Mom
Ind. - A 6-year-old boy found a new toy while riding in the back seat
of his mother's sport utility vehicle - a .38 caliber revolver. He picked
up the gun and accidentally fired it, shooting and injuring his mother
as she drove. According to Indiana State Police Trooper Robert May, Tomekia
R. Wilson was driving on Interstate 69 with her son and her sister when
the boy discovered a duffel bag under the seat and pulled out the gun.
The gun discharged while he was playing around and sent a bullet through
the back of the driver's seat. Wilson was struck above the waist, said
May. "I reached in and grabbed the gun from him," May said.
"I ended up making him a balloon toy." Wilson was taken to the
hospital and listed in stable condition after surgery. The boy could not
be held responsible in the shooting and the accident remained under investigation.
Christian Nudist Camp
a Quaker in Hudson, Fla., has a dream of a family friendly, Christian-themed
nudist community in a Tampa suburb. He wants a place not unlike the paradise
described in the book of Genesis, before Adam and Eve ate illegal fruits,
acquired shame and fashioned fig leaf clothes, the Orlando Sentinel reports.
"The Bible very clearly states that when Adam and Eve were in right
with God, they were naked. When people are in right with God, they do
not have to fear nudity," says David Blood, executive director of
the project. Martin wants to call the "naturist" park Natura,
where there would be an open church, a giant water park and nude volleyball.
- Detroit-area police are looking for a man who's broadcasting rude remarks
to Burger King customers at the drive-through window. Police in Troy told
the Detroit News Thursday the man has interrupted business transactions
three times, most recently Tuesday, with obscene comments to startled
customers. When the 41-year-old manager went outside to apologize to customers
and look for the source of the salty talk, a voice boomed out of the outdoor
speaker: "There's nothing you or the police can do about this, so
get your fat ass back inside and take your goons with you," according
to Troy Police Lt. Gerry Scherlinck. Police suspect the calls are being
made by a radio transmitter or walkie-talkie somewhere near the restaurant.
Golf Course Resident Gets the Boot
MIAMI - A
man who made his home on a golf course for the past 40 years has been
told to leave because some golfers said that he frightened them. Other
golfers feel that Kenny Bethel is harmless and should not be forced to
leave Palmetto Golf Course. Bethel, 55, came to the course after he ran
away from home in 1963. He collected and resold stray golf balls, used
the club's showers and toilets at night and slept in a sheltered area
by the showers. His wife Francis joined him nine years ago and they have
since been residing in a space under a nearby bridge. Staff now chases
Bethel away when he tries to gather balls and the restrooms are locked
at night. Golfers who were used to seeing him on the course were surprised
that he was banished. "It seems a shame that someone who is an institution
on the course can't be grandfathered in," golfer Jim Adamson said.
Wis. - A researcher from the University of Wisconsin at Madison has created
a new method to slice cheese - by using a laser. "At any other university,
people would have just laughed. But this is Wisconsin. It's cheese. And
this is no laughing matter," said Xiaochun Li, a mechanical engineering
professor and laser expert. Li, along with engineering graduate student
Hongseok Choi, has discovered that the same kind of laser used for eye
surgery can be used to slice Wisconsin's famous food product. Li first
tried to use a traditional commercial laser that uses heat to cut by melting
or evaporating, but that fried the cheese. Trying again, he used a new
class of laser, known as a cold laser, that cuts by blasting apart the
molecular bonds that hold materials together.
Germany's government knows how to take care of its frogs. It is spending
$285,200 to construct a tunnel for frogs to use to avoid the dangers of
busy streets. Ruediger Zech, a local council spokesman, said the tunnel
would allow native varieties of toads, frogs, and other amphibians to
safely reach a nearby lake. The creatures had previously been carried
across the road in buckets by volunteers from nature protection groups.
Construction for the tunnel is being funded by the foreign ministry and
is a part of a package of environmental measures agreed to when the ministry
took over the Villa Borsig. The tunnel will be located near a training
center for diplomats on the outskirts of Berlin.
Skeleton Stunt Derails Teaching Career
Ill. - A veteran social studies teacher in Evanston, Ill. is fighting
a transfer for hanging a skeleton in the teachers' lounge to protest standardized
testing. The skeleton was dressed in a Michael Jordan basketball jersey
and dangled from a rope. Vicki Proctor told the Chicago Tribune the hanging
skeleton was a political statement against federal testing requirements
-- not a racial statement because African-American students on average
lag behind whites in standardized testing. Proctor was transferred from
the majority white Martin Luther King Laboratory School to the district's
alternative elementary school for students with disciplinary cases. She
is appealing the transfer.
British war leader Winston Churchill's 104-year old parrot is still alive
and kicking and refusing to speak to the media. A British newspaper tracked
down the bird and found out it was still living. "They've been trying
to get him to talk all day, but he's not saying much," said Sylvia
Martin, who manages Heathfield Nurseries where Charlie has lived for the
last 12 years. Charlie, who stayed with Churchill during World War II,
was known for squawking obscenities about Hitler. Martin said that the
bird has mellowed in his old age. "He doesn't say very much anymore
-- usually just hello and goodbye. But he does get so excited about music
and dances to it. He's very fit." Charlie - who is actually a female
- is now owned by Peter Oram, the owner of the garden center.
cab driver Robert Baker won $3.2 million at a Las Vegas video slot machine
at the Golden Nugget Hotel and Casino. Baker hit the jackpot on an Elvira,
Mistress of the Dark Video Slots machine -- the largest hit ever on a
nickel slot machine -- setting a new world record. Baker says he will
continue to drive his cab. "I need to take some time to figure out
what I'm going to do from this point and going about my life as usual
seems like the best way to keep my feet on the ground," Baker says
in a statement. He says the only thing he knows for sure is that he'll
fulfill a lifelong dream to buy a Lincoln Town Car.
- An Indian diamond merchant is stuck with the crappy job of digging through
cow dung after his prize cow swallowed over 1,700 small diamonds. Dilubhai
Rajput had stored the bag of diamonds, worth almost $900, in a stack of
hay at his home in Gujurat state. He hadn't considered that his hungry
cow would find the jewels and make them his meal. The cow is now feasting
on a diet of grass, grain, fruit and laxatives and Rajput has recovered
300 diamonds in three days. "I am sure within a week I will retrieve
all my diamonds," Rajput was quoted as saying. It was not known why
he had chosen to hide the diamonds in the hay.