Cajun Humor
...and some people consider this to be racist.

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Mr. Boudreaux Signs a Census Form 
Four Cajuns Discuss the Fastest Thing in the World 
Thibedeaux Wanted Blue Crabs
Water Skiing in the Bayou?  
Boudreaux Working at a Drugstore
Pierre's Wife and the Landlord

Why hate someone for the color of their skin when there are much better reasons to hate them.
-Denis Leary

Mr. Boudreaux Signs a Census Form

Mr. Boudreaux was a typical, uneducated Bayou black man.  De Census man...he come to de Bayou and he's takin' down all dis infomation.
He say to Mr. Boudreaux, "Just fill in this part of de form and I'll be on my way."
Mr. Boudreaux says, "Well, you'll have to come sit by the side of me and fill it out cause I can't read or write."
So de Census man..he sit down by the side of Mr. Boudreaux and he begin askin questions and writin' on de form.  Pretty soon he comes to de end of de form and he say to Mr. Boudreaux, "Just sign it down der at de bottom."
Boudreaux says, "You already know I don't read or write...I can't sign dat form!"
So de Census man, he says, "Just make an X."
So Boudreaux, he make a great big X at de bottom and a little, itty bitty one right beside of it.

The Census man, he says, "what's wiff dat little bitty x next to de big one?

Boudreaux, he says,  "I'm a Junior!"
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Water Skiing in the Bayou?

The President is touring the Bayou.  He sees a little black boy bein' towed by a speed boat.  He says to his guide, "Look at that.  Isn't that nice that those boys are letting that little black boy ski behind their boat?"
The guide, he say to the President, "I'm sorry Mr. President, but that don't look so nice now...dem boys is trollin for alligators!"

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Four Cajuns Discuss the Fastest Thing in the World

Four Cajuns were sitting around a campfire near the Atchafalaya Basin. They were "philosophizing" on what was the fastest thing in the world.

Boudreaux said, "I tink de fassest ting in the werld is a 'tought', because before you ken tink of it it's already tought."

Thibodeaux said, "No, the fassest ting in the werld is a 'blink' because before you ken tink about it you dun blunk already."

Alfonse said, "No, the fassest ting in the werld is lectricity because when you turn dat light switch on de lectricity travels fass-fass and the lights come on before you know it."

T-Boy said,"Ya'll all wrongg, the fassest ting in the werld is diarrhea."

Everyone asked, "Diarrhea?"
T-Boy said, "Yea, lass night before I could tink, blink, or turn on de lights, I don shit ma pants."
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Thibedeaux Wanted Blue Crabs

One time, ol' Thibedeaux wanted his favorite meal, blue crabs. His big fat wife said, "Arright Thibedeaux, I tol' you wot I'm gonna do. I'm goin down to de bay an caught you some blue crabs, cher. An den I'm gonna fix you de bes' boiled blue crab you eva did have." Thibedeaux said, "Whoo, big fat wife, dat would be mo' betta dan blackberry wine, cher!"

The next morning, Thibedeaux's big fat wife got ready to go catch some blue crabs down at the bay. Thibedeaux said, "Wot time you is goin to be back home, big fat wife?" She said "I'll be home in time to clean an cook dem crabs for suppa, Thibedeaux."

All day long Thibedeaux waited for his big fat wife to get home. It got to be about five o'clock, and Thibedeaux thought, "My big fat wife mus' be catchin a big mess a dem blue crabs or she woulda been home by now."

Then it got to be about nine o'clock and Thibedeaux's big fat wife still wasn't home. Thibedeaux thought, "Whar in de worl' be my big fat wife?"

It got to be midnight, and Thibedeaux's big fat wife was still missing, so Thibedeaux decided to call the Sheriff. Thibedeaux said, "Sheriff, my big fat wife wen' down to de bay to caught me some blue crabs dis mornin, but she still not home." The Sheriff said, "OK Thibedeaux. We'll go out to fin' yor big fat wife."

At one AM, Thibedeaux heard a knock at the door. It was the Sheriff. Thibedeaux asked, "Sheriff, did you fin' my big fat wife?" The Sheriff replied, "Thibedeaux, I got some good news an I got some bad news."

Thibedeaux said, "Oh no. Gimme de bad news firs'." The Sheriff said "Wall, Thibedeaux, we foun yor big fat wife. She dun fell into de bay an got drown." Thibedeaux said "Oh my po' ol' big fat wife."

"But you know wot?" the Sheriff went on, "We foun' twenty seven o' de biggest Blue Crabs you eva saw hangin on her." Thibedeaux said, "Oh Sheriff, dat's not good news!" The Sheriff said "No Thibedeaux! De good news is we're gonna run her agin in about a hour!"
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Boudreaux Working at a Drugstore

Boudreaux got himself hired at a drugstore, but a salesman he was not. He could never find the items that the customers wanted and the boss told him that the next time he missed a sale, it would be his last.

Thibodeaux came into the drugstore about that time looking for cough syrup cause he was coughing real bad. He asked Boudreaux for the best cough syrup that they had. Boudreaux looked and looked, but he couldn't find the cough syrup.

Remembering what his boss had told him he decided to improvise and make a sale. He gave Thibodeaux a box of Ex-lax and told him to take all of it at one time. Thibodeaux did what Boudreaux told him to do and then walked outside and leaned against a telephone post. The boss came over and asked what that was all about. Boudreaux said "He wanted something for his cough, but I couldn't find the cough syrup, so I substituted Ex-lax and told him to take it all at one time."

"Ex-lax? That won't cure a cough!" the boss shouted, really mad. "Sure it will," said Boudreaux pointing at Thibodeaux leaning on the post. "Just look at him. He is afraid to cough, now!"
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Pierre's Wife and the Landlord

Jacques and Pierre went out huntin wit Pierre's new rifle. Jacques was up a cypress tree looking through the scope. He says to Pierre, "Pierre, mah friend, I can see yor house thru dis here scope."

Pierre replied, 'What is it dat you see?"

"Your wife." came the answer.

And den Jacques, he said, "Oh yes, and dere's Mr. Boulliard, yo landlord...he's wiff yo wife."

Den Jacques, he say "Tell me, mah friend, what would you do if you caught yo wife cheating on you?

Pierre, he say, "I'd shoot her head off wiff dat gun o'mine."

Jacques then asks, "What about her lover? What would you do wiff him?"

Pierre, he say, "I'd shoot his balls off wiff dat gun o'mine."

Jacques, looking through the scope, says to him, "Well, mah friend, looks like you could do da job wif just one bullet!"

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